"Is there someone destined for me?"
Im just quoting a friend (single obviously) who is dying to meet the one. People tend to talk about the one - yes that's the ideal person whom they think will be the perfect partner. The one who he or she is gonna spend the rest of his or her life with. The one meant to be. She was surprised when I said, there's no such thing as someone meant for you - she found it mean of me. Well I know I'm mean most of the times, but she felt like I'm judging her destiny.
It is indeed a question of the reality of fate.
For me an individual "finds" a partner because of the inate need to have someone with him, who compliments his character - or maybe not, that's why we have different acceptances of a relationship. Either we look for that one, or we bump it to that person (which most people call fate), part of the reason why we find that one is because we wanted to - intentionally or subliminally (because the culture dictates that it is the norm to have a partner).
Finding one is different from keeping one. A person may find it easy to always find one, but hardly keeps one. Or it's the other way around. To even consider him as the one is still dependent on the two persons decision to make it, to adjust to each other to be compatible - to be in a relationship. It is not something that is bound to perfection without each person's effort to make it better.
No wonder why most young people have shorter termed relationships because of their idealism that there is someone meant for them in the future, while most of the matured ones tend to find the right one after several tries because they learned what they need to do to have "a partner", not to have "the partner," unless they grow immature and be left looking.
And that's why I know a lot of couples who thought they are meant to be, yet in the end, they break up. I am sure they expected the other to be this way since he is "meant" to be, overlooking the fact that the other person also expects for her to be in another way. It's the lack of contentment. But if they both adjust and get used to each others' characters - all that one benefits from and all those things one wish would change, it is then a matter of decision.
The point is: We don't just bump into the perfect one. We have to work for it.
Now forget the coffee. Beer anyone?
Now forget the coffee. Beer anyone? 